|A selection of photos made from my 18th birthday until now|
Today is the day that I step into the last 365 days of my teenage years, in other words it's the day I turn 19. I know that it's not a big deal at all, that age is just a number and not at all an indication as to how you should feel or act. However I find it so weird that this number makes me feel so uncomfortable. I am the kind of person that is very mature and particularly serious (about 80% of the time) for their age. Yet I feel such pressure towards turning 20, I know that I'm being such a drama queen since I still have a year to go.
Nevertheless we all know how quickly one year goes. Somehow I feel like the number 20 indicates that I'm leaving a whole chapter of teenage years behind and I'm stepping in the fase right before adulthood. Coming from me this is absolutely ridiculous since I already said that I'm pretty mature, I already know what I want and do not want to achieve in my life, where I see myself in the next five years et cetera. On the other hand I also feel like maybe I've been a little bit too mature for all these years, they've passed by so quickly and I hardly ever fully lived in the moment. Maybe it's time for me to start living in the moment more often, enjoy life while it lasts and more importantly while I'm able to.
The fact that I'm halfway through my studies and so close to reaching so many of my goals, if exciting and scary at the same time. I've been looking forward to this particular time of my life for so long that I might have put way too much pressure on it. I'm not any one else, I'm still the same little girl that dreamed about all these things however I'm about to do them now. This is the time for me to put aside all of my fears, to make myself proud and to just go for it; be it achieving my goals or taking a break from my journey to really live in the moment and do whatever it is my heart desires at that very moment. If not now, when...
*Me writing a three-paragraph long post about this age has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I actually have to write an essay...
Cheers to many more years together!
Lots of Love,